Day 8: Keepers of Elysium

Next deadline: Sunday, February 19th at 11:59 EST

Team Members:

Captain Destin
A random guard

As Nirkit tried to lift the ship with his mind, he was able to lift it up just long enough to hold it, then put it back down, effectively doing giant-metal-boat-mind-lifts and improving his powers so much that he realized he had mastered [all the psychic powers].  Still, if  that fatty mcfat fat had left the ship like he requested, he might’ve been able to move the ship with his mind as well.  Now conscious of his weight, the guard spends the day doing sit-ups and obviously won’t be the cumbersome burden of fat in future attempts to lift the ship,

Meanwhile, in the puzzle room, Destin was enjoying his glowing hand while ready to try and solve the puzzle once more.


Lit, Lit, Unlit, Lit — to — to Lit, Unlit, Lit, Unlit


Lit, Unlit, Lit, Unlit — to — Unlit, Lit, Unlit, Unlit


Unlit, Lit, Unlit, Unlit — to — Unlit, Unlit, Lit, Lit


Unlit, Unlit, Lit, Lit — to — Lit, Lit, Lit, Lit

The mysterious door opened, and inside you find an old dusty weapon hilt.  Picking it up, the blade instantly transforms to look just like your beloved Chaladholg, meaning the treasure of this puzzle was the legendary [Blade of Ideal].  This weapon was of the [highest quality] possible of a weapon, and possessed the magical quality of converting your biggest weakness into your greatest strength, which in Destin’s current physical condition made his [agility] equal to his [luck] as long as he was wielding the sword.  By game mechanics standards, this was ridiculous – normally agility capped out at a certain point, indicating that one has [all the agility].  But in the kind of loophole that can only be created by the most fickle of the attributes, [luck], Destin actually operated at [more than all of the agility] while wielding the blade, and to make matters even sillier, he knew his luck was nowhere near capped!

LEAVE IT TO DESTIN TO BREAK ALL OF THE GAME MECHANICS IN HALF THEN QUARTERS AND FINALLY INTO EIGHTHS.  Though honestly this could all be explained by just saying that Destin had gotten lucky.

Even stranger, the glow from his hands slowly crept up the blade, increasing it from a two-hander into a what-the-heck-how-does-anyone-wield-this-hander.  Oddly enough, with all of the agility Destin felt that he could swing the blade despite its ridiculous size, but it definitely put some a lot of strain on his arms.


2 thoughts on “Day 8: Keepers of Elysium

  1. (UE, this post was amazing. YOU are amazing. (Bro hug!) I’m embarrassed to admit that I was thinking off and on throughout the day what would be behind the door; I thought it wouldn’t meet my hype but hecks ya it did! Thank you ^_^.)


    Destin’s face reflected his fractured mind. This just wasn’t possible. How did the Chaladholg, the legendary blade of the Zenobian people, the sword that was augmented with his own soul, find its way here? Was this entire place a dream? It could not be the same Slayer. This priceless treasure, this Blade of Ideal, must have replicated it down to every ornate aspect, including his own soul. He felt the same connection with this blade that he did the original Chaladholg, but not the same intimacy; his own soul was indeed in his one, yet still fully in himself. Were there now two Destin’s?

    “….The magical hand dust is gone!”



    Destin will wait out the storm, then head back to the Vexilla. On the way, he’ll try to increase his strength so his arms won’t be strained by the Chaladholg. He’ll do it in a way where he also exercises his luck, making the strength training not as effective as it could be.

    BIG P.S.-

    I might not have access to the computer for the next couple of days (flying out to California!). If I can’t make it for the next few turns, Destin worked on his luck and repairing the ship. But, UE, if that’s stretching the rules, don’t allow it and it’s totally cool.

    Nirkit! If I can’t do the above, please control me psychically to do the above! Unless it’s not cool with UE! AND DON’T DO ANYTHING SEXUAL WITH ME.


  2. Nirkit looked at his watch. Destin should have been back by now. The storm was over, so why wasn’t he back? Peering into his mind, Nirkit realized that Destin didn’t think the storm had passed yet. So Nirk did the sensible thing and psychically made Destin move in the direction of the boat while he was doing pushups while picking 4-leaf clovers with his teeth, or however one improves strength and luck at the same time. Nirk hoped Destin would have the good sense to try to catch koi while he was being dragged through the water.
    Nirk hadn’t peered too deeply into Destin’s mind to see exactly how he was doing what he was doing because Nirkit was multitasking. Not on anything in particular, mind you, he was purposefully multitasking to get better at multitasking, so that when he multitasked in the future he’d be better at it. He understood it wouldn’t make digging 4 holes in a day as good as digging a single hole in a day, but he hoped that eventually doing pushups while reading physics books would be easier and he’d get more strength and intelligence than if he’d multitasked without training his multitasking.
    So while dragging Destin back to the boat with his considerable psychic powers, Nirkit did his best to keep occupied with at least two other activities so that he wouldn’t necessarily get better at any of them, but would instead become a better multitasker.

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